In last Sunday’s edition of the largest San Francisco Bay Area newspaper,
the front section was only eight pages long, and it contained ten advertisements.
Of those, five tried to sell the reader on how to feel better. It seems that
the pain in the back is a major problem, and one full-page advertisement
described the advantages of spinal decompression, another on curing lower leg
pain, and a third on sciatica. A fourth advertisement came from two
chiropractic doctors who declared that they could help anyone suffering from
“arthritis, knee pain, cartilage damage, bursitis, tendonitis, and crunching
and popping sounds.”
However, those essential sounds help me know that I am still alive.
There was also another regularly run advertisement for 50% off implants
and crowns, along with a free initial consultation (Reg. $400). See the earlier
July 28th blog for similar, competitive advertisements that may help
Obama’s fund raising.
Also on Sunday, that same newspaper published an informative, laudatory
24-page section on the $1.3 billion Levi’s Stadium in Santa Clara, the new home
of the San Francisco 49ers football team. The stadium is about forty-five miles
from San Francisco.
That section contained thirty-four advertisements filling thirteen total
pages. One advertisement offered a “49ers Specials” good for both hair loss
replacement, as well as for treatment to enable you to be “the man you used to
be.” There was only one advertisement on dental implants.
In a front-page article in the main news section, an extremely talented
writer got carried away and likened the stadium to other well-known edifices
noting that “every great civilization in history has relied upon monumental
architecture to assert its power, from the Parthenon of ancient Athens to the
cathedrals of France.”
Let’s hope that he was being facetious.
Print advertising in my daily newspaper is somewhat entertaining and
acceptable, including those from companies who are trying to enhance my body
and improve my health.
I am truly grateful for the healthful commercials that run on the
evening news on NBC, CBS, and ABC. They push products to better handle life’s
true medical problems including indigestion, constipation, bladder control, impotence,
incontinence, diabetic nerve pain, heartburn, eye problems, being overweight,
and overwrought.
After each product’s benefits have been extolled, the viewer is then
inundated with hurriedly spoken warnings on the usage. They make me wonder if
it’s worth buying products that help pharmaceutical companies to increase their
already massive profits.
Every little bit adds up.
Why not have a big corporation like Coca Cola sponsor our gravesides? That would save our heirs big bucks when we drop dead and fall into the greedy hands of funeral directors. Ask AARP to promote my idea; such as, Here Lies GORDON GREB, Courtesy of Coca Cola, Because He Loved The Pause That Refreshes.
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